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So I called him a ‘doughnut eating Gestapo.’ He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first. Then he wrote a third ticket. This went on for about 20 minutes. The more I abused him the more tickets he wrote. Personally, I didn’t care. I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had a bumper sticker that said, ‘Clinton in ‘16.’ I try to have a little fun each day now that I’m retired. It’s important to my health.This One Is Compliments of Charm_BHere’s one I found funny:All mushrooms are edible, but some only once.These Are Compliments of John ASome are dated but are still funny...1. My goal for 2016 was to lose just 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was a pizza. I ate a pizza.3. How to prepare Tofu:a. Throw it in the trashb. Grill some meat4. I just did a week’s worth of cardio after walking into a. I am not. Now fucking stop and let me up.” She was starting to get her attitude back and I looked over at Tina who was lightly fingering the stun gun. I smiled and walked over to the table from the other side. “Open up sweetie, I have a nice tasty but plug for you!” I said with all of the saccharine I could muster. She glared at me and clamped her mouth closed. “Wrong answer.” I said. The jolt hit her in more or less the same shoulder and her mouth flew open as she shrieked. I dropped the toy in her mouth as her Mother pulled the probes away from the shoulder. Putting my hand over her mouth I smiled as she panted around the plug. “You seem to have enjoyed telling me and your mother that we could do things the easy way or the hard. For the next five days you may want to heed your own advice.” I smiled at her. “So where shall we start?” Tina asked. “Your choice,” I replied. “Since she has been abusing you longer, An evil smile crossed her face. “Go get the box of.
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